Dear Diary
by Velvet Storm
Summary: Read the diary of the wench, Isabelle, and how her life changes when she meets the infamous Porthos, one of the Three Musketeers...
1. Part One First Sight

September 1639

Dear Diary, I'm afraid I don't know the day from the night anymore. I drink when I'm thirsty; eat when I'm hungry and sleep when I'm tired. I've completely lost all track of time and have no idea what day of the week it is, not that it matters really. There's a constant party downstairs. Laughing, talking, drinking, eating, dancing; it's all nonstop. Not that I mind it of course. I don't regret leaving home. I know it's only been a couple months but I'm much happier. This is all I'm really good at anyway. I can sing, I can dance, I can flirt with the men who stop in looking for a little fun, and sometimes I can do a little more when the right one presents himself properly. As long as we wenches don't fight with each other and keep the men happy, we're provided with shelter and food and clothing. It's not a bad deal really. Much better than where I would have ended up. I do wonder how Mother is though.

Two days later – September 1639

Dear Diary, I saw the most amazing men earlier. Mina told me they were musketeers; they protected the king. How brave and strong they must be to take such a task! I did not speak with them however. Mina said they had chosen wenches and that I should not approach them. I did watch though. Three of them were quite lively, laughing and drinking and dancing. One sat alone though, drinking, not looking very happy. They were all so handsome! One was a little young but cute. Another had dark hair and was fairly quiet while the other one with long dark hair was quite the boisterous one! The one drinking alone had light brown, almost blond hair. How lucky those wenches are to be chosen by them.

A week later – October 1639

Dear Diary, oh heavens what a terrible experience. I hope this doesn't happen often. Thank the God of Mercy that Mina saw what was happening and went to get Master Noel. A man summoned me so I fetched his drinks and joined him at his table. We talked and soon I was sitting in his lap; not so uncommon. Immediately, he began to try to slip his hand underneath my dress, of which is uncommon while still at the table! I tried to coerce him in to going upstairs where my bedchamber was but he said he wanted me right then. He was very mean and already drunk with ale. He must have stopped at another tavern before stumbling into this one. Mina saw him and went to get Master Noel while this man got very physical with me, almost throwing me around. I fought him as best I could but his strength was no match for me. He had me pressed up against the hard stonewall, my dress lifted, when Master Noel grabbed him by the collar and threw him out. Goodness. Mina put me to bed to calm my nerves. She did tell me it happens once in awhile but not all the time and that Master Noel is quick to throw them out.


	2. Part Two Asked About

A month later – November 1639

Dear Diary, I'm so excited I can barely write! I was sitting at a table with a couple men when two of those musketeers came in! It was the two dark haired ones. My heart started beating faster as I tried to give my attention to the men I was with. It was much difficult. I discreetly watched as they sat down at a table and were quickly united with their wenches. I couldn't help but be jealous. I'm as good a wench as those girls even though I haven't been here as long. When I fetched the men more spirits, I did purposely walk by their table, although I did not make eye contact. Mina told me later that the one with long dark hair did watch me. He watched me! I thought I'd faint! I do hope they come in again soon. For some reason, that one just really stands out from all the other men that come here and I can't help myself.

A couple weeks later – December 1639

Dear Diary, Master Noel set me up with a gentleman. He didn't tell me much about him except that he was a man of position and wealth and didn't want anyone to know he was there. The man was brought in through a side entrance and led upstairs to my chamber. I only had a couple candles lit but even through the darkness, I could see he was quite handsome, very distinguished. Men usually don't make me nervous, well except for that one musketeer, but I found myself wondering if I would be good enough for this man. I greeted him and asked what I could for him. He smiled, took my hand and kissed the top of it. "I am pleased with Noel's selection," he told me, his eyes scanning over me. I thanked him for the compliment and asked again what his request would be. He took off his hat and tunic, set his sword down on the floor and took me in his arms. "Just some time with you," he whispered before he kissed me. It was such an incredible experience. He was gentle and sweet and more romantic than I thought any man could be. Romance isn't something we wenches get much of. He even did things for my pleasure, which is almost unheard of. We had a very nice time; I hated to see him go. He did ask if he could request me again next time he came through town and of course I told him yes. I wish they were all like that. Mina told me I was very fortunate so I spent the next number of hours, probably a couple days, with Master Noel, in gratitude.

A couple months later – February 1640

Dear Diary, it's been almost six months and I'm really glad I'm here. I've been having such a good time. There's only one wench I don't like; and no one likes her. I've even talked to the ones that are with the musketeers. I finally found out their names too. Porthos is the one I like; Aramis is the other. Athos is the one that always sits alone while he drinks and D'artagnan is the young one. Lisette, the wench of Porthos, says he is a wonderful man. She says he's funny and very nice, gifted in bed as well. I blushed when she told me that. Josephine, the wench of Aramis, told me he was a hopeless romantic, always ready with a poem to recite. She said he was okay in bed but his romance more than made up for what he lacked in size. Kassia is the only one who has been with Athos and she said that he broke down in tears over his wife who was executed years ago. She said he's an incredible man who is unfortunately still grieving over this woman who must have been a great love. Kassia told Mina and me not to ever repeat it. D'artagnan hasn't been with them long. Because he hasn't chosen any wenches, it's rumored he's a virgin! Can you imagine?

A week later – February 1640

Dear Diary, I just spent the last week with Mother. She sent for me as she is very ill. Master Noel said I could go stay with her for a week. It was near impossible for me to leave for I do not think she'll make it much longer. I'm saddened over this. I was greeted with good news though when I returned, which served to raise my spirits slightly. Mina told me she overheard Lisette telling Josephine that Porthos was asking about me! Not by name of course, but Mina says Lisette said he described me. Can you believe it? I was shocked. I wonder if Lisette knew Mina was listening and said it on purpose since she knows I like him. I mean, I don't think she'd do that but some wenches are not completely trustworthy. And Lisette and Josephine are older than Mina and me. I don't know what to think. I'm upset about Mother but excited about the possibility of Porthos asking about me. I don't know if I should trust Lisette though.


	3. Part Three My Name

A week later – February 1640

Dear Diary, I just spent the last week with Mother. She sent for me, as she is very ill. Master Noel said I could go stay with her for a week. It was near impossible for me to leave for I do not think she'll make it much longer. I'm saddened over this. I was greeted with good news though when I returned, which served to raise my spirits slightly. Mina told me she overheard Lisette telling Josephine that Porthos was asking about me! Not by name of course, but Mina says Lisette said he described me. Can you believe it? I was shocked. I wonder if Lisette knew Mina was listening and said it on purpose since she knows I like him. I mean, I don't think she'd do that but some wenches are not completely trustworthy. And Lisette and Josephine are older than Mina and me. I don't know what to think. I'm upset about Mother but excited about the possibility of Porthos asking about me. I don't know if I should trust Lisette though.

A couple months later – April 1640

Dear Diary, my hands are still shaking. I was cleaning up after a group of men that had just left when Porthos, Aramis and Athos came in. D'artagnan wasn't with them. I did my best not to watch them but I had to sneak a peak at Porthos. God of Holiness did he look good! As usual, their wenches joined them as Athos found a dark corner to sit in. I went about my way, clearing away empty plates and ale steins. Lisette left Porthos to fetch him food and drink. I walked by the table where he sat, on my way to finish up the dishes when he grabbed my arm. I was shocked! I froze while he looked up at me and asked, "What's your name?" I tried to say my name but nothing came out. I felt my cheeks grow hot. "Um, Isabelle," I finally whispered. He promptly let go of my arm and I continued on my way, barely able to walk. He talked to me! And asked my name! Oh what a beautiful day! I didn't see him anymore as I had dishes to wash and I didn't want Lisette to suspect anything. I just can't believe it. Looks like she was telling the truth after all.

A couple more months later – June 1640

Dear Diary, I can't stand it. I was hoping Porthos and his friends would have been back by now. He asked my name. He stopped me and asked my name! I wonder if he'll talk to me next time they come back in. I can't believe this one man has captured my attention like this. It's not supposed to be this way. It's one thing to 'be' chosen but it's something different to 'choose'. Why am I so compelled by him? Why is it I keep seeing those big brown eyes staring up at me when he asked my name? And that one man that Master Noel set me up with came back for time with me. All I could do was picture him as Porthos though. I just couldn't help it!


	4. Part Four Chosen Wench

Three weeks later – July 1640

Dear Diary, he came back! He came back by himself too. I was surprised because there are usually at least two of them together. I tried not to watch him but couldn't help it. I was standing over with Mina when he turned and winked at me! I looked at her and we both started laughing as I tried to cover my blush. I felt uncomfortable and didn't know what to do so I left the main room and went down the corridor leading to the downstairs chambers. I was leaning against the cold wall with my shoulder, hand to my chest hoping my racing heartbeat would slow, when I heard a voice behind me. "Hello Isabelle," I heard. Startled, I spun around and was face to face with Porthos. My breath caught in my throat. I couldn't speak and was so embarrassed but excited. It was dark in the corridor and the fire from the nearby sconces danced in his dark eyes. He towered above me as he smiled. "I know you can speak," he told me. "Should I not have approached you?" I found my voice and answered, "I'm sorry, Sir. You caught me off guard. I was startled." I was amazed I was still standing as my knees were wobbling. "Interesting," he told me. "Usually one is startled when they are not expecting someone." He stepped slightly closer. "You were not expecting me?" I glanced up into his eyes but then quickly looked away. "I…Sir I…I was talking with the other wench and I just needed a break…so I got away from everyone…" I stammered. Porthos leaned against the wall then and played with a couple loose strings from the top of my blouse. "So tell me," he said, wrapping them around his finger, openly staring at my chest before looking back into my eyes. "I've heard a rumor." I watched the strings wind around his finger, hardly able to stand there so close to him. "You have, Sir?" I asked, still not able to look up into his eyes. "Yes I have," he said. "Want to know what it is?" I glanced up quickly and smiled. "I would," I answered, looking away. I was so nervous. "I've heard there's a certain wench who has an interest in me," he said, dropping the strings and playing with the sash around my waist. "Know anything about it?" Oh God of Heaven. How could I answer him? "I know Lisette sits with you," I said quietly. He laughed and I couldn't help but look into his eyes and smile. "She has," Porthos said, dropping the sash and lifting my chin with his finger. "But a man can change his mind, can he not?" He kept his finger still, not letting me look down. My eyes locked onto his and I didn't want to look away. "Yes, Sir, he can," I agreed, smiling slightly. Did I dare ask? I couldn't as much as I wanted to. "So I've told Noel that you're my chosen wench," he said. "Beginning now." My eyes grew wide. His chosen wench! My God of Earth! I barely knew what to say. I was shocked. "Me?" I finally said. He laughed again. "Yes, you," he confirmed. "Unless I'm mistaken about which wench was interested in me." I blushed again. "No, Sir, you were not," I said quietly. Smiling, pleased with himself, Porthos said, "Well come then, new wench. I'm thirsty and could use some company." I spent the next few hours with Porthos and I finally settled down and was able to talk to him without being so nervous and uncomfortable. He was very funny but also very smart. I enjoyed listening to his stories, especially the ones about the king. I hated to see him leave but I knew he had important matters to attend to. "I must thank you," I'd told him. "I'd not been anyone's chosen yet." He smiled as he put his hat back on. "And I thank you for being interested," he said and then left. Can you believe it? I'm Porthos' chosen wench! Oh beautiful day!

One week later – August 1640

Dear Diary, I cannot believe it. I'm still in shock I think. I hope I wasn't dreaming. I've asked Mina to pinch me a couple times and I don't wake up. Since being chosen as one of the musketeers' wenches, I have not been given to any other. Instead, Master Noel has been training me as barmaid, teaching me how to make a couple mixed ale drinks for the men. Lisette has been really nice too. I was hoping she wouldn't scorn me. Josephine has been talking to me more often too. I have yet to find out who told him I was interested. Not that it matters really. I'll enjoy it as long as I can. He'd been with Lisette almost a year. I tried to ask her questions about him but she refused; said I'd find out all my answers for myself in time. I just wish he'd hurry up and come back!


	5. Part Five First Time

Five weeks later – October 1640

Dear Diary, Porthos came in! I was so happy to see him! I immediately rushed over to him with a cold stein of ale. D'artagnan and Aramis were with him too. They were concerned about something but I didn't dare ask what. Based on what they were saying, it had something to do with a plot to kill the king and a messenger they were trying to find. I didn't understand all of it and didn't want to. Porthos kept me close and it was nice. He was in rare form though, drinking lots of ale and sharing his stein with me. I don't drink all the time and it wasn't long before I was drunk. When our local musicians began to play, Porthos and I danced all around, soon followed by everyone else. It was quite the spectacle! After a few minutes, I began to feel unwell so I slipped out of the dancing crowd to the side corridor to catch my breath. I felt slightly dizzy but very happy. I rested my head against the cold wall, listening to the sounds from the main room, and laughed. "There's my wench," I heard a voice say and looked to see Porthos walking towards me. I stood up and said, "I'm sorry, Sir. I just needed some air." He stood in front of me. "You know, you could call me Porthos," he said. "After all it is my name." I smiled. "Okay, I will," I told him. He raised his head, listening to the noisy crowd from the main room. "My, aren't they loud?" he asked, stepping closer to me, placing a hand on either side of me on the wall. "Yes they are," I agreed. He leaned closer to me, and at first I thought he was going to kiss me. Instead he moved closer to my ear and whispered, "Maybe we could find somewhere a little quieter." When his eyes met mine, I said quietly and with pounding heart, "My chamber is upstairs." Was this really going to happen? I'd been with men before. What was my problem anyway? "Let's go then," Porthos said, taking my hand in his. His hand was so warm and felt so strong holding mine as we climbed the stone stairs and walked down the hall to my chamber. I was nervous and fought it every step. I opened the door and he closed it behind us. I quickly lit a couple candles so there would be a little light in the room. When my eyes met his, my knees felt weak. My head was already spinning from the ale but seeing the fire dance in his eyes was too much. "Come here," he said, standing by my bed. I inhaled deeply and slowly walked over to him. "Look at me," he said gently as I lifted my gaze to his. "You are nervous, no? You are not untouched." I fought another blush. "Sir…Porthos…I'm afraid I drank a little too much ale," I told him. He smiled. "Ah, but then you should have little inhibition," he pointed out. For the first time I was afraid that I might not be enough for him. I certainly didn't want to disappoint him. I began to back away from him, saying, "I'm sorry Porthos. Maybe I should fetch another wench for you that…" His finger to my lips silenced me. "I chose you because I wanted you," he told me. I watched as his fingers began to loosen the ties of my blouse and then the sash around my waist. "Watch my eyes," he whispered. "Not my hands." When I looked up, I did not see the Porthos that I usually saw in the main room. His laughter, his smile, his joking…it was all replaced by something different. I searched his eyes. There was hunger and desire and the expression on his face made my heart race. I'd never seen a man look at me like that before. It was intoxicating. Within a matter of seconds, all my clothing, including my undergarments, were all in a pile on the floor. I stood in front of him naked, a very odd feeling for me. Usually when we were with men, we kept most of our clothing on. We were encouraged to actually. I said nothing though but did try to fold my arms across my chest as I felt exposed and wasn't used to it. "Don't," he told me, taking my hands in his. I watched his eyes scan my body, wishing he wouldn't but enjoying it at the same time. "You are beautiful," he told me, eyes joining with mine, his lips forming a small smile. He was pleased and I was happy. "It is your turn," I said bravely with a small smile. His eyebrows raised as he said, "Oooh, my wench finds her nerve." He stood up and began the task of taking off his layered clothing. I could hardly believe it as I watched more and more of his skin revealed. My heart was pounding and I thought for sure he heard it. I stood there watching him in silence, amazed at his size, his muscles, everything about him. "You are pleased?" he asked me, raising an eyebrow for he knew he'd caught me staring at him. He then reached up and slid the bandana off, shaking his head so his hair would fall naturally. "Oh my," I whispered, not realizing I'd said it out loud. He smirked and walked over to me. "Have you ever had a man drape his hair across your body, caressing you with it?" he asked, voice slightly lower than usual. Did he say what I thought he said? "No," I answered quietly. "I've not had the pleasure." Turning me around so I was facing away from him, one arm stayed around my waist, holding me against him, while the other released my hair pin, allowing my locks to fall to my bare shoulders. Sweeping all of my hair to one side, the right side of my neck and shoulder bare, Porthos' lips were immediately next to my ear, whispering, "You will." He then lightly kissed my neck, working his way down with light touches of his lips to my skin, out to my shoulder. Ripples of excitement shot through me, causing me to moan quietly. His hands slid to my breasts, cupping each one, gently squeezing, fingers playing with my nipples, still holding me against his warm body. I reached up to play with his hair that was tickling my bare skin as his head was slightly leaning against mine. I was sighing and moaning from his amazing touch, feeling his sex harden behind me. "I want you," he whispered in my ear. "You have me," I told him quietly. "I am your chosen wench." He turned me around to face him, cupping my cheeks in his large hands. I'd never seen such seriousness in his dark eyes before and was almost concerned. "I want you to want me for me," he said. "Not just because you're my wench." I searched his eyes for a moment. It was a side of him I'd never seen and wasn't sure how to react to. He was really being serious. "Porthos," I said, covering his hands with mine. "I wanted you the first day I saw you walk in. Me being your wench just enables me to be with you." He studied me for a moment, as if sizing up the truth in my words, before leaning forward and kissing me with his full warm lips. His mouth closed hungrily over mine, slipping his tongue between my lips for the wet kiss I craved. He tasted of ale but it was delicious to me! His hands fell from my cheeks as our arms wrapped around each other, mouths still joined. Porthos broke our kiss, quickly picking me up in his strong arms and then laying me down on the bed. He bent his head over me and caressed my body with his long dark hair, from my face all the way to my toes. I wiggled with pleasure. It was amazing! Soon he was covering my body with his, his hands exploring and crawling over me, causing me to moan and sigh even more. When he slipped a finger inside me, he groaned, much to my surprise. "You've not been with many," he whispered. "I like that." Reaching down to touch his hardness, somewhat surprised at his size, I told him, "I've only been a wench the past year." Holding me in his arms, my legs around his, Porthos said, "Isabelle, you're a beautiful woman." As I looked up into his eyes, I smiled and said, "Why thank you, Sir." I felt his hardness near my sex but he didn't prod further. Instead he held me close, passionately kissing me, not able to get enough. "There's so much…I want to do…with you," he said in between kisses. "And yet I just want to be inside you." I held his hair back and said, "We'll have other times together." Certainly this wouldn't be the last! The seriousness returned to his eyes as the energy around us shifted into something I can't explain. His lips a breath away from mine, he told me, "We're meeting at the castle. The king's life is in grave danger." I reached up and brushed dark hair from his eyes. "You're a musketeer," I told him. "You will save the king. I've heard stories of your bravery." He nodded. "Yes, yes," he said. "But can a man not be concerned with his own mortality? Wonder how long he'll be able to dodge the sword?" I touched his cheek and answered, "Yes he can. Fear is real even in the bravest of men." Porthos nodded his head. "So it is," he said quietly. I knew thoughts of the upcoming event were beginning to consume his mind so I gently pushed him to his back, climbing on top of him. "Just be with me," I told him, running my fingers along his chest. "You will continue to be the brave musketeer you are. You and the others will prevail." He smiled, taking my hands and kissing them. "I find it so easy to believe you," he said. I raised my hips, slowly pushing onto his hardness, closing my eyes as I was completely filled by him. I moved slowly, both of us moaning and asked, "Will this distract you?" He moaned, almost sounding like a quiet growl, as he held my hips with his hands. "Oh God," he breathed. "Yes that will do it." He guided me up and down his length, both of us moaning in near unison. He felt perfect inside me. When I leaned down to kiss him, he wrapped his arms around me and rolled us over, never breaking our union. His warm body covered mine as his dark hair fell towards me. "I've dreamed of this," I said before I knew it. "Have you now?" he said with a smile. "I have to confess…the first time I saw you…I knew I wanted you as my wench." I couldn't believe it! "Really?" I asked. "But what about Lisette?" I thought for a moment and added, "Never mind. That's none of my business." Porthos laughed, holding me tighter, and then pressed his lips to mine.

We spent the next hour having sex. God he was fantastic! My visuals would never again compare to the real thing! He was strong, yet gentle and sensual, yet funny at the same time. It was such a beautiful mixture and I really didn't think it existed in men. He paid a lot of attention to me and while I liked it, because I wasn't used to it, I was slightly uncomfortable. He confidently told me to get used to it. Afterwards, he stayed with me for quite awhile. Usually, once things were over, the men left; some with a kind word, some saying nothing at all. But Porthos remained in bed with me, holding me, caressing me. I couldn't help but wonder if he did all the same things with Lisette. Part of me wanted to be something special to him that no other wench had been. I reminded myself that I WAS a wench and that I should be thankful he even chose me in the first place.

When we finally rose from bed, he gathered my clothes along with his, and handed them to me. We dressed in silence but did smile at each other. Once fully clothed, he came to me and hugged me against him in a tight bear hug. Oh it was wonderful! He said he would hopefully see me soon; that he was on his way to the castle to save the king. With one last kiss, he closed my chamber door behind him. I didn't sleep for hours. I just replayed our time together over and over and thought how fortunate I was to be his wench. He's just an amazing man.


	6. Part Six Where's Porthos?

One week later – November 1640

Dear Diary, I'm worried. It certainly wouldn't take a week to save the king, would it? I know nothing about such matters. I do hope the king is safe but I miss my Porthos. I've only had one night with him and am ready for so much more. I know I have a limited amount of time with him and want to make the most of it. I've talked with Lisette, Josephine and Kassia and they all assure me he, along with the other musketeers, is fine. They told me stories of previous encounters but it only served to cause me more worry. How long could he continue without getting killed? I pray to God for his safety constantly and for a quick return. I wonder if he's thinking about me at all? If I even cross his mind? Listen to me…I'm being so selfish. Here he is risking his life for another and I'm concerned with if he's thinking about me or not. Have I become so shallow?

Two weeks later – November 1640

Dear Diary, there's still no word. No one has heard what has happened. We've even asked men passing through but no one knows. None of the musketeers have come in. I don't say anything to anyone but I fear the worst. I continue to pray for his safety but he certainly would have come back by now. Wouldn't he? Maybe I should ask Master Noel if he could schedule men for me again. Get my mind back on what I'm supposed to be doing. I'm too wrapped up in Porthos. I hate to admit this, but I cried the other night at the thought of him never coming back. It was bad. This is so hard. I've gone from such a wonderful high to a horrible low. What do I do?


	7. Part Seven He's Alive

Four days later – December 1640

Dear Diary, praise God in Heaven, Porthos is alive! All the musketeers are alive along with the king. Their mission was successful. And while I don't know everything that transpired, they say that the king will have more power than ever and that there will be more musketeers. They are quite happy and relieved with the outcome. I was up in my chamber when they arrived. I just hadn't been feeling well with the thought of losing Porthos. That's when Mina knocked on my door. "Yes?" I called out. "It's Mina," she said, opening the door a little to peak in. "There's someone here to see you." It was unusual but I asked, "Who is it?" She pushed the door all the way open and Porthos bounded into my room. "Isabelle!" he exclaimed, holding out his arms. My eyes got big, mouth dropped; I screamed and started laughing, then jumped up from my bed to run into his arms for his big bear hug. Mina quietly closed the door. "Porthos!" I exclaimed. "I thought something had happened. I'm so happy to see you!" He picked me up and spun me around before his lips met mine in a wet kiss. "I'm happy to see you too," he said. "I'm fine. All of us are fine. The king is safe." Being able to hold him again after thinking he'd been killed caused emotion to erupt inside me. I was so happy I started crying. I couldn't help it and was embarrassed but I was just so relieved. "What's this?" Porthos asked, sitting down on the bed with me, brown eyes meeting mine. "What's the matter?" I wiped tears and said, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't be like this. But I can't help it. I was so upset over the fact you could have been…that maybe you were…" I couldn't finish. I thought he'd tell me that I shouldn't be so worried about him or that this display was inappropriate but instead he put his arm around me, my head leaning on his shoulder, and just let me cry. I covered my face but he kept telling me it was okay, that he was safe now. It was a few minutes before the tears stopped. He was so sweet; he got up and wet a cloth for me to wipe my face with. He was taking care of me and I was supposed to be the one taking care of him. It was wonderful. Once I'd calmed down, he knelt in front of me and held my hands. "You all right now?" he asked with a smile. "Yes, Porthos," I said. "Thank you." He smiled at me for a moment before his eyebrows quickly shot up. "You know, I thought about you while I was gone," he told me. "I could never admit that to the other musketeers however." We laughed. "You really thought about me?" I asked in disbelief. "Even with all the danger that surrounded you?" He nodded. "Indeed I did," he answered. "Should I not have?" I was caught off guard momentarily. "Well…I…" I stammered. "Porthos, can I ask you something? This may be completely improper but…" Porthos laughed. "Like I'm one for proper," he said, shaking his head. "Ask away." "When Lisette was your wench, did you think of her too?" I asked bravely, hoping I wouldn't make him angry at my curiosity. Porthos got up and sat on the bed beside me. With a smile on his face and in his eyes, he answered, "No, not really. I can't even explain why I thought of you so. I shouldn't have. But I did." Both of us were quiet for a moment, the words floating in the air above us. I knew what I wanted to say and felt that this was the time. "Porthos I…I feel towards you…as I've not felt towards any others since I've been here," I said quietly, heart pounding. "A wench should not feel these things." His eyes held an emotion I'd never seen before; at least not directed towards me. "Nor should a musketeer allow his heart to be stolen by a wench," he added. "But, alas, somehow it has happened." My eyes grew wide. "His heart stolen?" I repeated. Porthos smiled. "Yes, stolen," he said. "I've not felt towards another what I feel towards you." Both of us sat there, surprised by each other's confession. "What do we do?" I finally asked. "Can we do anything?" Porthos leaned forward and quickly kissed me. "As long as I remain a musketeer, my loyalty belongs to the king and his safety," he explained. "Which means a wife and family would come second and that wouldn't be fair." My mouth dropped. "You'd consider taking a wench for a wife?" I asked in shock. Anyone taking a wench for a wife was unheard of and most certainly for a musketeer! Porthos laughed. "My Isabelle, you are not a wench at heart," he said, laying back on my bed and pulling me with him. "You are a beautiful woman and I often wonder how you ended up here anyway." Playing with strands of his hair as he held me, I said, "It's a long story I'll tell you at another time." I didn't want to share that information just yet. "So I remain here until you're no longer a musketeer?" I asked. "Or will you remain as such?" After a sigh, he answered, "I am unsure now. I've done this for a number of years since I was very young. It's all I've known. Part of me is quite tired, even though my heart is still with the king. I'd like to purchase some land and marry, maybe make a couple babies. You realize I am almost forty?" I knew he was older than me, just never knew by how much. "I'm much younger than you," I told him. "I know," he said. "And it's of no concern to me." He played with the strings of my dress. "I'm not getting younger and there are some things I want to do before I leave this world. The possibility of what could happen is catching up with me I guess." He leaned forward and kissed me. "Not that I don't want to talk anymore," he said with a smirk. "But I'd really like to show you how much I missed you." I laughed as he held me in his arms. "Then I get to show you how much I missed you," I told him. After another wet kiss, Porthos whispered, "I'm liking this 'showing how much we missed each other' thing." We spent the next couple hours in my chamber, making up for lost time.

Later, we cleaned up and went back downstairs for food and drink. Talk about a party! Even Athos joined in! I still can't believe Porthos though. To think he would feel more for me than any other and I him. It's more than I ever could have imagined!

One week later – December 1640

Dear Diary, that party lasted three days! Porthos and I went back and forth between my chamber and the main room. It was wonderful! And I wasn't the only one. I saw Kassia disappearing with Athos and couldn't believe it! I asked Porthos about the change in him and he told me about meeting up with his bride, whom he thought was dead, finding out she was the messenger and then the execution. He said because of everything, Athos had somehow worked through his feelings. I spoke with Kassia later and she said she'd never seen Athos so passionate. We were sad to see them leave but knew they had matters to attend to. I would never admit this to anyone, but after being with him for three days in a row, I cried when he left. What is wrong with me?


	8. Part Eight The Child

Three weeks later – January 1641

Dear Diary, I was sent for by Mother's doctor. She does not have much longer. It's a matter of days now. Master Noel said I could stay as long as I needed. I've been here two days already and she's pretty bad. I wish Porthos were here to comfort me. There is no one but me to take care of her; no other family around. She did tell me today that I would be inheriting the house and the land and would not need to continue wenching. I must say I was surprised but did not ask many questions. I guess she's already has the paperwork drawn up for it. I just don't know what to think about anything right now.

Two days later – February 1641

Dear Diary, Mother passed today. You know, I cried but it really hasn't hit yet. I know she's better off, and even though we weren't real close, it still hurts. There are arrangements and things to take care of that I'm just not ready to handle. God. What do I do now?

The next day – February 1641

Dear Diary, I can't believe it but Porthos is here! He showed up looking for me at the tavern and when Master Noel told him what was happening, he asked for directions and arrived this morning! I saw him and fell into his arms crying. I just couldn't stop. He picked me up, carried me inside and held me until I could stop crying. He's been wonderful; so supportive. He's helped me tremendously with some of the arrangements and legal affairs I just didn't have the ability to handle. He also told me that the ride to the house was a shorter distance from the castle than to the tavern where I've been living. He asked if I would be moving back here since it was now mine. I told him that I hadn't really thought about it and wasn't sure just yet. I like the tavern but this has always been my home. I don't know.

A week later – February 1641

Dear Diary, I went back with Porthos and told Master Noel that I would be returning to my home. I didn't want to sell it; I wanted to live there and work the land. He understood and said that he'd miss me. I fetched my things and said goodbye to my friends. They weren't too far away that I couldn't visit them, but it would be different not seeing them every day. I was sad. I was sad about Mother and about leaving my friends. I was happy with Porthos though. God he's just everything to me. He's staying with me for a few days to make sure I'm settled and before heading back. I'm going to miss him terribly.

Four weeks later – March 1641

Dear Diary, life at home is certainly different. It's so quiet. It's just me in a small house. I'm used to there being lots of noise and lots of people around. I've been back to the tavern once; I had to. It was a wonderful visit with everyone. I couldn't stay long. I wasn't feeling very good plus I had plenty to do around the house. Porthos came by for a couple days. We always have the best time together. He makes me laugh. He makes me feel so happy and alive. He was a little concerned about me being sick though; said if I wasn't feeling better in the next few days to call the doc. We'll see. I'm just overdoing it in the field. I could use more sleep.

Two months later – May 1641

Dear Diary, I'm the happiest I've ever been! I've finally got the field under control and everything is growing tall. I was a little concerned with food for a while but we've been getting rain and that's helped. Porthos has been staying with me at least a couple days a week. I adore him more every day. Even more so now as we've found out I'm with child! Can you believe it? I'm almost three months now. We were shocked at first, even considered not keeping it. But we were lying in bed one night, his hand on my stomach and started talking to the baby. He was so cute. He looked up at me from my stomach and told me, "I want to have this child with you". I brought up what people would say about a previous wench having a musketeer's baby and the gossip but he didn't care. He said the most important thing was us and no one else mattered. I'm so lucky to have him.


	9. Part Nine Marriage and Birth

Two weeks later – May 1641

Dear Diary, oh God of Heaven! Porthos arrived and had another man riding with him. He came inside while the man stayed outside. "Aren't you going to invite your friend in?" I asked him. He smiled at me and said, "Well that depends." Then he knelt down, took his hat off, placing it over his heart and asked, "Isabelle, will you marry me?" He paused a moment and added, "Right now?" My mouth dropped! "What?" I shrieked. "Marry you? Right now?" I was laughing and smiling and just beside myself. "Oh my god!" I exclaimed. "Yes! Yes I'll marry you!" He stood up as I threw my arms around him, him picking me up and spinning me around. We hugged and kissed until Porthos remembered the man outside. He rushed to get him inside quick, introducing us. He went over a couple legalities with us before asking if we had rings. Looking embarrassed, Porthos said he hadn't got them yet. I told them that I thought my parents' rings were in the house so I went looking. Ten minutes later, I handed them to the man. "I'm not sure if they'll fit but we can fix them later if they don't," I told Porthos. Excited, we went outside where he took out a Bible and performed a quick ceremony. The rings were a little too large but it was okay. When we heard "you may kiss the bride", Porthos grabbed me and passionately kissed me, much to the amusement of the man. We thanked him and Porthos paid him before he left. I'm married though. I can't believe it. And married to Porthos a musketeer! And having our child! Life couldn't certainly get any better!

Three months later – August 1641

Dear Diary, I've been with child almost seven months now. Daily tasks are difficult. With the king's blessing, Porthos was able to borrow a couple field workers to help me. He also told me that when it was time, he would fetch the midwife that had just delivered the king's first son. Mina, Lisette, Kassia and Josephine visited me for a couple days. They couldn't believe we'd gotten married and that I was pregnant. They were happy for us though and that made me feel good. Aramis and Athos stopped by a few days ago to tell me congratulations on the marriage and the baby. They said if there was anything they could do to just ask. Wonderful, wonderful men they are. And everyone has said that I'm having a boy. I'm not sure why but that's the consensus. Porthos and I talked and decided that if it is a boy, his name will be Philip. It was my father's first name and his grandfather's middle name.

Two months later – October 1641

Dear Diary, I'm so very tired. Philip Armond was born two days ago. Porthos and the midwife were by my side the entire time. I'm grateful for their help. I never could have done it without them. Of course, I'm not too sure I want to do it again. I didn't know pain could be so excruciating. I actually passed out once and they had to revive me. But I did it. Porthos and I have a son. I'm overwhelmed to say the least. Neither of us has been around children much but we love Philip already. We've talked to him for months now. Porthos is especially proud. He hardly ever puts him down! He's told the other musketeers that he must remain with me for three months while I recover; midwife's orders. It will be the longest we've been together uninterrupted. I'm looking forward to it. I love him dearly.

Three months later – January 1642

Dear Diary, Porthos has to go back to the castle for a few days. He's been with me every day since Philip was born and has been incredible. I haven't been able to do much at all so he's been the one doing all the cooking and cleaning. And he's been so good with the baby. It's been quite a learning experience for us both really. Philip cries so much; rarely sleeps through the night. I wish Mother were here to help me. Porthos sent for the midwife to stay with me until he returns. She's been a huge help. She's really taught me much about babies that I never even dreamed of. I just can't wait for Porthos to get back.

One week later – January 1642

Dear Diary, my husband returned this morning. He immediately took Philip and spent the rest of the day taking care of him. It's fun to watch Porthos with him; warms my heart. He wraps him in his arms and you can barely see Philip. After we put him to bed and finished up with dinner, Porthos approached me and wrapped me up in his arms. "Have I told you how much I love you, Isabelle?" he asked me. I smiled. "No, not recently," I told him, putting my arms around his neck. We kissed, gently at first but soon we were grasping each other, not able to get close enough. Releasing me slightly, breathless from our kiss, Porthos asked, "Must we wait much longer?" Philip was four months old and I was completely healed from his birth. "No, Love," I answered. "I am ready for you." Porthos immediately picked me up and carried me to our bedroom. "It's been…so hard…not to approach you," he said, quickly removing my clothing. There was an instant passion. We knew we didn't want to wait. "I know," I agreed, feverishly working on his clothes. "It's been hard to wait." We climbed into bed, Porthos covering my body with his, and whispered, "I'll be gentle incase you're still sore." I wrapped my legs around him and said, "I'll let you know if it's too much. Just love me." We spent half the night making love and stopped only when Philip began to cry. I was a little sore the next morning but said nothing as I knew it was temporary. I just love Porthos so much.


	10. Part Ten Conclusion

Six months later – July 1642

Dear Diary, I've not had much time to write anymore. Philip is one and moving constantly. Kenneth, one of the king's workers that Porthos permanently hired for us, had to build a pen for me to put my son in when I'm out in the field. He looks so much like Porthos too. My husband has only been spending one week a month at the castle, which has made me very happy since he's with Philip and me the other three. Eventually I think he'll leave but I will never bring it up. He knows what's best. I took Philip by the tavern a couple weeks ago and everyone just loved him. He was passed all around the room; I didn't see him for almost two hours! Lisette brought him back to me and told me, "You and Porthos have a beautiful son. When I say I'm jealous, I mean it in the nicest way possible." It was sweet and I hugged her. She really cared for Porthos. I often think of why he took me for a wife. What made me different than the others? What made me stand out? What makes him love me so? I try not to waste much time thinking about the answers. He does love me, is a wonderful husband and father and knows how to take care of everything. I wish Mother could have met him. She would have liked him too.

Four months later – November 1642

Dear Diary, well you won't believe it. I'm with child again. We weren't really trying, it just happened. Porthos and I are very passionate about each other and don't usually miss too many nights when we're together. We try to watch my cycle but I guess we lost track. Porthos is excited and I'm scared. The first one was difficult enough. I hope this one is easier. Philip is now trying to walk which is good. I didn't want them too close in age. Another child. Sometimes I look at Porthos and I still see us in the tavern as him being the untouchable musketeer and I being the shy wench with a crush on him. Then I realize that he's my husband of almost two years, that we have a son and one on the way. We're a family. And I'm just deliriously happy with all of it.

Ten months later – September 1643

Dear Diary, Symonne Elise is two months old and a wonderful baby girl. She sleeps through the night and rarely cries. She's quite the opposite of Philip who constantly cried and was very fussy. Even the birth was easier than with my son. Porthos is so proud. He invited Aramis and Athos over. They spent a couple days with us and it was great. They're such incredible men. They played with Philip who is everywhere and into every thing and also took turns holding Symonne, who was quite content with everyone. A couple evenings ago, Porthos and Aramis were playing with Philip out in the yard. I sat in a chair holding Symonne, just watching. Athos knelt down beside me, gently touching her small cheek. "You and Porthos have a beautiful family," he told me with a sad smile. "I thought one day I might have one of my own." I'd grown fond of Athos over the past couple years. He was such a good man, with a heart full of love to give and no one to give it to. "You still can," I told him. "Porthos hadn't planned on this either but here we are, married and two children." He half laughed and said, "I'm afraid not, Isabelle. My heart only loved one and she's gone. There is no other for me." I smiled and handed Symonne to him. "Hold her," I told him. He took the wrapped bundle, cradling her in his hands and just gazed at her as if she were a rare jewel. "Excuse me, Sir, but my daughter is a little young for you," Porthos said, walking up to us. Aramis was with Philip, holding his hand. Athos shook his head and laughed at Porthos' comment. "Don't worry my friend," he said with a smile. "She's in safe hands." "I think the king will have to be safe in your hands as well," he said, glancing at his friends. "I'm leaving the musketeers." My eyes grew wide as Aramis and Athos looked at each other and then at Porthos. "You sure?" Aramis asked. Porthos nodded. "Yes," he said. "I've thought about it for months now. I've got a wife and two children. I can't take the same kinds of chances I took years ago. I've spoken with the king and he asked if I'd remain one more month." I stood up and hugged Porthos. "I know it's hard for you," I told him. "But that's wonderful news to me." Athos, holding Celia, looked at Aramis, holding the hand of Philip. "Come on," I said to everyone. "Let's have a celebration dinner for Porthos." It was a wonderful evening for Porthos and me even though I know Aramis and Athos found it bittersweet. I just hope Porthos won't regret the decision.

Two months later – November 1643

Dear Diary, Porthos has been retired from the musketeers a month now. The king, in gratitude for his years of service, made sure we were well taken care of. Philip is two and is into everything. Porthos tries to direct his endless energy into skills so he too can be a musketeer one day, should he choose. Symonne is five months old and a jewel. She's so happy and laughs all the time. Porthos and I have a beautiful family and a wonderful life ahead of us. Sometimes I still can't believe it.


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